| An MRI (or magnetic resonance imaging)
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| | twist ties from the extension cord, then
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| scan is a radiology technique which uses
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| | I grabbed the radio with one of my
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| magnetism, radio waves, and a computer to
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| | favorite CD's and plugged that into the
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| produce images of body structures. The
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| | extension cord. Then I tried to figure
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| MRI scanner is a tube surrounded by a
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| | out how to turn my ordinary refrigerator
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| giant circular magnet. The patient is
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| | magnets into a small electron magnet.
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| placed on a moveable bed which is
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| | There was a flurry of activity as I
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| inserted into the magnet. The magnet
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| | grabbed the anodes and cathodes, my cat,
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| creates a strong magnetic field which
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| | (He was playing with one of them) and I
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| aligns the protons of hydrogen atoms,
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| | attached wires, fuses, toggle switch into
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| which are then exposed to a beam of radio
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| | a continuos loop.I sure am glad that I
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| waves. This spins the various protons of
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| | didn't waste any time going to
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| the body, and they produce a faint signal
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| | electronics in high school or the Navy
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| which is detected by the receiver portion
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| | because I had this all figured out in no
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| of the MRI scanner. The receiver
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| | time. I think I found my niche in the
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| information is processed by a computer,
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| | world. Five, ten, and even 15 minutes
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| and an image is then produced.At the
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| | later there was still no smoke on the
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| doctors on Friday afternoon I was told I
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| | magnet. This was when I now had to do the
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| might need an MRI, the above paragraph
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| | hardest thing, and that was logging off
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| tells the medically minded people what an
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| | of so I could use the computer to create
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| MRI is... I'm not medically minded nor do
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| | the "I" in the MRI. So there I was,
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| I have one of those machines at my
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| | completely alone with no one IM'ing me or
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| disposal. I do have a radio, which does
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| | chatting on Scrolling IMs... I unplugged
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| generate rock and roll radio waves, a
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| | the computer from the wall and plugged it
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| computer(even though I rent it) and I
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| | into the extension cord then I plugged in
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| have a magnet. I also have a lifetime
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| | the extension cord into the wall. And
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| memberships to ACME, the very same
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| | nothing happened. I turned on the
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| company that Will E. Coyote uses for his
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| | computer and as it was going through the
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| gadgets to stop a very fast bird found in
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| | booting and the Welcome to MSN I tried to
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| some southern states.I give Acme a call,
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| | rub the converted electric magnet over my
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| tell them what I want to do and they send
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| | leg. All I could see was wavy lines on my
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| me some anodes, cathodes, a few light
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| | monitor.I thought, "Oh No my leg went
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| bulbs, a toggle switch, a few 20 watt
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| | back into the Navy and didn't invite me".
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| fuses and an three receptacle extension
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| | After a few moments I figured out that
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| cord. They also sent me some very
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| | was impossible because my leg was still
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| detailed technical drawings called pink
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| | there and functioning. Then I came up
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| slips(I guess they thought that I wanted
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| | with a Nobel Prize winning idea... I put
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| to have a drag race with their x-ray
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| | the electric magnet in the shell of my
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| technician) These drawings were probably
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| | mouse and connected it to the computer. I
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| drawn by an overly intelligent five year
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| | put this up to my leg and I nearly ran a
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| old because the pictures looked like a
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| | marathon around my livingroom. I really
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| house, a tall stick woman with long hair,
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| | got a charge. Now if you know anything
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| a taller stick man with a cowboy hat, and
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| | about electronics you know I have made
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| a smaller stick person walking a dog. I
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| | all of this up so please don't try this
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| used one of my refrigerator magnets and
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| | at home...and listen to your
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| hung up the picture on my freezer door.I
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| | doctor.Christopher Williams is an author
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| poured myself a drink of Kool-Aid (and
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| | on ( ) Feel free to check out some of
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| YES I did keep it away from my keyboard),
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| | my other writing at ( )He has been
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| then I walked into the livingroom
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| | writing for most of his 38 year old life
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| workspace and looked at all the stuff I
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| | but within the last five years has found
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| had collected to make my very own MRI.
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| | his niche in writing Comedy. articles.
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| The first thing I did was remove the
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|
